As a person who constantly makes lists — on Post-It notes, mostly, but sometimes on Starbucks napkins or pages ripped from my pocket-size Moleskine — I occasionally have the funny, cringey experience of finding an old list floating around from months or even years earlier. When read after the fact, these lists always seem alarming and like a very insane person wrote them, but it wasn’t an insane person, it was just me trying to remember what to do and say each day. So sue me.
Today on a powder blue post-it I found the following list. Written just like this.
Foods that (seem to) make me itch:
1) Lasagna – 12/5/11
(I was attempting to start a “food log” which is what they’re always saying to do when you’re trying to sleuth something out. The food log was because I was having a super itchy left arm and couldn’t figure out what was causing it to flare up. My theory now, actually, is that I was having anxiety about Thanksgiving, a holiday whose existence gives me semi uncomfortable feelings each year because I never quite get in the spirit of it, yet the world around me seems to really want me to. Don’t even accuse me of not loving my family and friends! It’s not about that. One thing it might be about is that here in southern California, November is a summery 80 degrees and thus sometimes TG just seems like a strangely-timed appetizer for Christmas. What’s so wrong with just having Christmas? It’s coming up in like 3 weeks, people!! Sue me again, I guess. Anyhoo, my left arm eventually cooled out. Obviously now I can see that it would be really strange — like medically speaking — if lasagna was causing my arm to itch. But at the time I’d had it up to here and was all Let’s get to the bottom of these hives, yo!)
Here’s an artifact I found recently when looking for something in LadyBaby’s medical file. I brought this Terrified Nightmare of a New Mom List with me to one of her first pediatrician appointments.
?’s for Kleiner
• diaper rash